[He Said] No Hard Feelings

Attention Target Store:

I am writing this message to supplement the recent letter from my wife. I want you to know that I am fully aware of your relationship with Jen! I know of Jen's affection for you, and I have my eye on the situation.

Now, with that said, I understand that you both are good to each other; and Man to store, that's fine. But you best check yourself! This codependency between you two has gone far enough. Perhaps a little time apart will be a good thing.

I'll bring her back around before too long, and let you spend some time together. In the mean time, keep your coupons and ads to yourself!

-The Husband